The Nonverbal Advantage
People are constantly telling each other exactly what they think and feel … often, it has nothing to do with the words they say.
The boss tells you that he likes your idea and is considering implementing it. But if he’s leaning back, arms crossed with a forced smile, he’s sending the opposite message. Customer’s may say they are not interested in making a deal, but if they keep glancing at the contract on the table, they’re telling you they are interested.
Understanding body language is a critical tool in today’s business environment. Unfortunately, few professionals read the clear signals of others. And worse, most people don’t have a clue how their own behavior is sabotaging their efforts.
In her latest book, The Nonverbal Advantage: Secrets and Science of Body Language at Work , Carol Kinsey Gorman identifies six factors in the workplace that make body language more important than ever before.
1. Emotional Literacy Words communicate content. Body language comments on the emotions and relationships behind the words. What really counts is the quality of the interpersonal relationship that exists between the sender and receiver. A large part of that relationship is determined by nonverbal cues.
2. Leadership’s move from Command to Influence Managing a global enterprise has altered the effectiveness of “command and control” tactics. Today, executives must lead through influence, rather than relying on the illusion of control they believe comes with their job title. Influence relies on two skills: (1) the ability genuinely understand the other person’s perspective (which includes knowing how to read their nonverbal messages) and (2) the ability to align the spoken word with body language that supports the intended message.
3. Validation of Face to Face communication When a leader must deliver bad news or communicate any kind of change, the research says the best way to do it is face-to-face. Regardless the number of times and ways announcements are made internally employees want to be able to look at the boss, not just to hear the boss, but to see the boss, as he/she says it.
4. The Visual Technology Revolution The days of ducking behind computer monitor and ignoring nonverbal behavior are over. Cisco Systems is working on products that make the virtual experience almost the same as a face-to-face interaction. Cisco’s TelePresence uses “life-size” HD video with directional sound technology that makes participants in a video conference between New York and Hong Kong feel as though they are actually in the same room.
5. The Global Work Force In the high stakes world of international business, body language often speaks for itself. Unfortunately, much of the meaning may be lost in translation. The most innocuous of gestures, when misinterpreted can wreak havoc on business dealings.
6. The Latest Science A research team at MIT have developed small devices that track not only a person’s physical location, but also their body language. By taking notes of people’s proximity to others and the patterns of their movements (body language), the MIT team is gathering insights into the subtle differences between effective and ineffective teams, and the kinds of interactions that build or block collaboration.
Psychologist Carl Rogers believes “Real communication occurs when we listen with understanding - to see thee idea and attitude from the other person’s point of view, to sense how it feels to them, to achieve their frame of reference in regard to the thing they are talking about.”
Reaching that goal of understanding, of empathy, can mean a big difference to leaders in the business word. Which is why nonverbal cues are so important to our professional relationships and a such a critical part of business communication.
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